- Am I good enough?
- Why should anyone listen to me?
- Everyone knows more than I do
- I give the impression that I’m more competent than I really am
- When people praise me for something I’ve accomplished, I’m afraid I won’t be able to live up to their expectations of me in the future
- I’m afraid people will find out that I’m not as capable as they think I am
- Sometimes I feel that my success in life has resulted from some kind of error
- I am scared I will be discovered for who I really am
- I often feel I am concealing secrets about myself from others
It’s that feeling that we have misled others about our abilities and don’t deserve to be here. It’s not so much what we said about our degree of talent but what we didn’t say. We often feel like we are a fraud or a fake, and worry that at any moment, others are going to discover the “real” truth about us.
Imposter syndrome is linked to feelings of self-doubt and intellectual fraud and can lead to failure. It is also associated with introversion and trait anxiety and is made worse by overly harsh criticism. Feeling like a fraud makes it difficult to accept positive feedback and praise from others, so we get to keep our conviction and beliefs about being an imposter.
We blame ourselves when things go wrong, and attribute success to external factors or exceptions, such as luck, rather than our own abilities.
In this article we will take a deeper look at what causes imposter syndrome and how we can get rid of it.
Coping Strategies and Types of Imposter Syndrome
There is a clear link between imposter syndrome and depression, anxiety, burnout, physical exhaustion, decreased job satisfaction, and performance. Imposter syndrome can manifest in five different ways. While there may be shared signs and symptoms across all forms of imposter syndrome, these five subtypes vary somewhat in behavioral and cognitive patterns because of differences in how self-competence is evaluated by the person.
The Perfectionist
The Perfectionists have high expectations of themselves and have a fear of criticism and failure. They focus on what could have been better. Competence is measured on being 100% successful and even the smallest mistake becomes a serious threat to their confidence and abilities. The Perfectionists think in all-or-nothing terms which makes it difficult to be flexible.
Working overtime, not taking breaks, over-preparing, and self-criticism are all strategies the Perfectionists use to prevent failure and motivate themselves to stay on top of their game.
The Perfectionists have a hard time receiving positive feedback from others and also minimizes their own successes. By doing so they do not acknowledge their own strengths and achievements which then reinforces their sense that they don’t know what they are doing and are not good enough.
The Overachievers
The Overachiever see themselves as incompetent and compensates by multitasking and taking on many roles. They often push themselves beyond their limit to ensure that they work harder than others and achieve more success in everything they do. They perceive leisure and relaxing as wasted time that could lead the Overachievers to burnout.
The Experts
The Experts measure their competence based on how much they know or can. In order to achieve this, they research and gather as much information as possible on a topic. Still the Experts fear that they do not know enough, which can lead to avoiding challenges such as taking auditions or job interviews.
The Geniuses
The Geniuses measure their competence based on how easily they can achieve things. They are used to doing well without having to put in too much effort and are likely seen as the straight-A student or the talented one. Things should come naturally and quickly, and it is expected to get everything right the first time or their sense of inadequacy gets triggered. This can result in avoiding new challenges in fear of not being able to immediately be good at them.
The Independents
The Independents believe that competence is only achieved if they accomplish things on their own. They prefer to work alone, avoid working collaboratively with others, and asking for help would reveal they are a fraud or fake.
What Causes Imposter Syndrome?
Factors that contribute to imposter syndrome are both internal, such as personality style and attachment patterns, and external, such as relationships, environment and societal values. The way a person is perceived, judged, or treated by others can influence their view of themselves.
Imposter syndrome can develop among children who are seen by their families as less intelligent than other family members. This can drive a child to overachieve in order to prove their family wrong. Families that perceive their child as superior, of high intellectual ability, and capable of easily doing anything they set their mind to, can lead to children believing that they should be able to achieve things without difficulty. Finding themselves in situations where they struggle can trigger self-doubt and beliefs that they are not as competent as others think. This can plant the seed that they must, therefore, be an imposter.
Life transitions such as a change in jobs, promotion, and graduation can trigger imposter syndrome. Transitions can naturally trigger self-doubts that hinder their belief in themselves and their abilities in their new role. Not looking for or taking advantage of new opportunities, can stop them from fulfilling their potential. By downplaying their skills and minimizing their achievements, they may unintentionally end up sabotaging their own career.
The imposter syndrome is based in a fear of failure and fear of being seen, or found out, as a fake. This can lead to anxiety and depression. In order to cope with these symptoms, we develop unhealthy coping strategies. This develops into a vicious cycle that can lead to even more stress, anxiety, depression, and burnout. The deceiving part is that some of the coping mechanisms can lead to successes and praise from others. However, since we are dealing with imposter syndrome, we are unable to take in the successes and praises because we attribute them to hard work (The Overachievers), high standards (The Perfectionists), natural talent (The Geniuses), or just pure luck. And so the cycle continues.
Imposter syndrome comes with a feeling of great secrecy and a sense of shame. The stress of being found out increases the urgency to hide the “ugly truth” because of the risk that people will not be accepting and may disapprove. As a result, many end up suffering in silence.
Being able to name and acknowledge the presence of imposter syndrome can enable people to talk more openly about it.
The Quick Fix
Oftentimes we perceive our problems larger than what they actually are. This "Quick Fix" section is meant to nudge you in the right direction. However, if you feel that your issues are more than you can handle on your own, do not hesitate to reach out and I will be your cheerleader and we will go through this together.
When you feel like a fraud it's in relation to some perfection that never actually existed. Letting go of some of the illusions will go a long way in helping you feel less like a fake.
Here we will take a look at several easy ways to break the cycle. The common denominator is to be kind to yourself.
Stop comparing yourself to others
Rather than looking to others, define your own goals, what experiences you would like to have. Set boundaries before going on social media. Most posts are not representative to reality anyway. Realize that everyone has their own strengths and weaknesses. You have the same right to be here as anyone else.
Own your successes
Realize that the opportunities you have had in your life were deserved. Whether you were in the right place at the right time, or you said yes to a new opportunity, you deserve the success. Allow yourself to accept positive feedback for a job well done.
Positive testimonials
We are much better at remembering what went wrong rather than what went well. When you feel like an imposter, one of the most difficult things to grasp is the role you have had in your own or others’ successes. Keep a record of all that has gone well, and then review them regularly. Collect positive testimonials, emails, comments, and recorded experiences in order to build a collection of authentic wins.
Expose Yourself to Yourself
Take a look at your thought process by setting a timer for 10 minutes. Write down your most limiting beliefs, thoughts about your abilities, worthiness, anything that makes you feel like a fraud. Push into the deepest taboos you hold. Seeing these on paper doesn’t get rid of them but externalizing things puts them in a more balanced perspective.
Nobody Knows Everything
Realize that no one can have all the facts or know how to do everything. It is ok to share information you know and it is ok to say that you don’t know or can’t do something. Be honest about your limitations otherwise the fear of being caught in a lie will be constant.
Confide in a Friend
Being able to tell a friend how you feel and why, can be a huge relief and be a starting point in breaking the cycle.
Need More Than a Quick Fix?
Given that imposter syndrome is not recognized as a psychiatric disorder, there is limited research around evidence-based psychological interventions to address it. The high prevalence of anxiety and depression that comes with imposter syndrome means that cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is typically used as a therapeutic approach.
If you are living with imposter syndrome we will first work together to recognize your unhelpful thinking patterns. It may be in response to insecurity, self-doubt, and attempting to live up to an idealized self-image. Then we will focus on building self-worth, strengthening your acceptance of who you are and explore where the fear of catastrophic failure comes from. Imposter syndrome comes with many rules, ideas, and stories of how you should be and perform. These rules can become rigid and lead to self-critical thinking, anxiety, anger, and shame if you do not follow the rules. There is a difference between getting caught up in your thoughts and observing the thoughts from a distance without becoming overly attached to them. Compassion-based motivation can be a helpful alternative that allows you to motivate yourself in an encouraging way and develop an appreciation of your strengths, qualities, and accept positive emotions and feedback. We will improve your mental environment and encourage feelings of self-worth and self-belief. The aim is to move forward rather than let a sense of being an imposter restrict your performance.
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